Nurse Finds Purpose In Losses: Supporting Others Through Grief

Family gatherings often remind Elise Marcello, RN, and her husband, Sam, that there should be two additional place settings at the table.

For the babies they lost.

Samuel Jr., and Evalena would be in school now, with their nine-year-old brother, Leo. Their home would be busy with homework, music or dance lessons, Scouts and sports.

Their daughter was born the day after Thanksgiving 2020. Evalena was extremely premature – at just 23 weeks and five days – and survived just eight hours. “She died in my arms. And it shook my world,” Elise said.

It was a familiar heartache. In March 2015, the couple was “blindsided” when their obstetrician couldn’t find a heartbeat during a check-up in the 22^nd week. Samuel Jr., was stillborn.

“I coped with it by throwing it all under the rug. I went back to work quickly and just powered through,” Elise recalled. As a nurse, she cared for children with cancer.

Between the infant losses, in August 2016, Leo was born, following a pregnancy filled with fear and worry.

When Elise got pregnant with Evalena she felt more confident. “We had a healthy, living son. We had a good outcome,” she said. “I expected to go into labor early with the third one, but I never thought it would be so soon.”

“I know how hard this is for the parents, and how important our work is to help them through this difficult time.”